


For science

by sunshineandeyebrows



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Bisexual Character, Boys Kissing, Demisexual Character, First Time Blow Jobs, Hand & Finger Kink, Hand Jobs, Kinda, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sexuality Crisis, a lil bit, and shy, best friends to best friends with benefits to lovers, boys being dumb, donghyuck could rule the world if he felt like it, experimenting, jaemin is the sweetest guy ever, lee jeno is oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-20 19:55:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19383631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshineandeyebrows/pseuds/sunshineandeyebrows
Summary: Jeno couldn't decide, if the meeting was something incredible or something he should run away from, but as it turned out, once Lee Donghyuck happened, he couldn't be driven away by any kind of moving force.That's how it all started.





	For science

**Author's Note:**

  * For [everyonethinksi_mperv](https://archiveofourown.org/users/everyonethinksi_mperv/gifts).



> for my bro, coz it was her idea

Jaemin and Jeno meet Lee Donghyuck like they've never met anyone else. Jeno could say that _he_ meets Lee Donghyuck like he's never met anyone else, but he and Jaemin have been a _we_ for a long time now and it's difficult to break the habit. Jeno counts it on his fingers and comes up with a nice number of fifteen years. That's how long Jaemin has been by his side, that's how much time they've had to learn each other.

Jeno considers it again and changes his mind. They didn't actually meet Lee Donghyuck. Lee Donghyuck happened to them. A natural disaster, frighteningly beautiful in its raw power. Lee Donghyuck swept them up in his momentum and burnt their lives to a crisp like a wildfire, in order to let something new grow in the now vacant place.

It went like this:

Jeno was preparing to go to sleep, the house silent and dark at almost three in the morning. His parents were asleep already and Jeno was planning to sneak into his room without waking them up, when his phone rang. Good thing he was in the bathroom and not outside his parents' bedroom door. It was Jaemin, because Jaemin is the only person Jeno wouldn't murder for calling him in the middle of the night.

"Can you come pick me up?" Jaemin slurred.

Drunk. Right, Jeno remembered, the clubbing with his university classmates. Jaemin rarely goes out without Jeno, but it was one of those nights.

"You said they'd take you home afterwards," Jeno told him.

He doesn't think he was angry then, but he remembers some kind of irritation.

"They got lost," Jaemin informed him sadly.

Jeno was pretty sure it was Jaemin who got lost. He glanced pitifully at his contacts put away in their little container and reached for his glasses lying on the shelf above the sink.

"Where are you? Can you send me your location?"

"My what?" Jaemin asked, dumbly.

Jeno sighed again.

"Do you see any characteristic places around?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah! There is a store."

Jaemin tried to pronounce the name enough for Jeno to understand. It took him four attempts. Jeno put it into the map app and left the bathroom to scribble a note for his parents in case they woke up before he returned. Finding a matching pair of shoes was a struggle, but Jeno managed. The night was cool, but the way late spring nights are cool, refreshing instead of piercing through to the bones like winter ones. Jeno got into the shitty old car his father bought for him with the expectation of Jeno crashing it sooner or later.

Jaemin was easy to find, in a small street, sitting under the store he mentioned. Jeno was glad it wasn't a chain store but a small, local shop selling all kinds of leather and furs.

"Jeno," Jaemin said as soon as he saw him, a huge, sleepy grin forming on his face. Jeno ignored the pleasant warmth in his belly upon seeing that stupid expression. "I want this," Jaemin added, pointing at a hideous, leopard print fur displayed in the window. "Buy it for me."

"It's closed," Jeno told him, that familiar feeling of fond exasperation spreading up and swelling in his chest. "I'll buy it for you some other time."

Jaemin contemplated that for a few seconds and then nodded heavily.

"Okay."

There was a loud crashing noise in the back alley next to the store. Jeno jumped, Jaemin didn't. He only turned towards the sound with a confused, "Huh?"

Something jumped out, barreling straight into Jeno. No, some _one_. Jeno barely held them both on their feet. Big, sparkly eyes met his own and something in him twinged.

"Help me!" the boy hissed urgently.

Jaemin straightened. He didn't look so drunk anymore. There was some more noise, a few curses, and another guy ran out of the back alley, skidding to a stop, once he saw the boy in Jeno's arms. Jeno tensed. Jaemin made a subtle step to half cover them both with his own body. Jeno wanted to smack him and tell him how stupid that is.

The guy narrowed his eyes.

"Hand him over," he said gruffly.

"Oh, I don't know, man," Jaemin said without slurring. "He clearly doesn't want to be handed over."

The guy cursed again.

"Look, this is none of your fucking business, okay? I have something to talk to him about."

Jeno glanced down at the boy's wide eyes and gripped his shoulders a little more tightly. He looked back up.

"You don't look like you just wanna talk," he remarked.

"I'd suggest you be on your merry way before I call the police," Jaemin added pleasantly.

The guy considered that, cursed again, turned away and left, stomping angrily back the way he came.

The boy in Jeno's arms sagged in relief.

"Oh my god, thanks, guys, that was fucking wild," he chuckled.

"What did you do?" Jaemin asked curiously.

"Oh, I conned him," the boy waved his hand in an easy gesture.

Jeno and Jaemin stared.

"What?" the boy blinked at them innocently. "It's not like he has any proof, it's his fault for being gullible."

Jeno let go of his shoulders. Jaemin snorted in amusement. Still a little drunk, then.

"So fellas," the boy started, dusting himself off nonchalantly. His big eyes swept over Jeno, then Jaemin, a dangerous smile on his face. "What is a place like this doing in hot pieces of ass like yourselves?"

Jeno couldn't decide, if the meeting was something incredible or something he should run away from, but as it turned out, once Lee Donghyuck happened, he couldn't be driven away by any kind of moving force.

That's how it all started.

*

"Jesus fuck, it's so hot," Donghyuck whines, fanning himself with the raised hem of his t-shirt. "Why did your AC have to break now?"

In an effort to not stare at Donghyuck's tanned stomach, Jeno doesn't look at him at all.

"You're free to go back to your dorm," he says.

"You know I wouldn't be able to get rid of the scent of my roommate's sweat for weeks," Donghyuck grumbles.

Renjun must be busy for Donghyuck to seek out Jeno first.

"I'm sorry, does that mean you don't plan on going back there at all until the semester ends?" Jeno asks flatly.

There are three days left, but that's beside the point. Jeno is only half sure Donghyuck is going to live with Renjun through the summer. If he plans to stay in the dorm, Donghyuck could very well mean he wants to avoid his roommate's sweat in Jeno's house for the next two months. And that- well, Jeno would not survive that.

"Your mom loves me, she wouldn't mind me living here," Donghyuck reminds him.

He stretches his long, tanned legs and props his bare feet on the coffee table. Jeno smacks them down, not because it's disgusting, but because they're too distracting. Donghyuck pouts at him. Jeno only sees it in the corner of his eye, but it's enough to set his jaw.

" _I_ would mind you living here," he mutters.

"You're awfully mean to me. How are we even best friends?" Donghyuck complains dramatically.

"We're not," Jeno says without missing a beat.

Donghyuck sticks one of his damp calves into Jeno's lap and Jeno almost breaks his laptop in half in surprise. Donghyuck's legs will be the death of him.

"Go fuck yourself, Lee," Donghyuck hisses.

Thank god the front door opens before Jeno has the chance to say something devastating like, _fuck me yourself, you coward_. Jaemin lets himself in like he owns the place, but Jeno's mother basically adopted him at one point, so it's not entirely untrue. Jaemin's gaze lingers on Donghyuck's leg in Jeno's lap for a second too long and Jeno feels that weird twinge again, familiar by now. Jaemin grins and Jeno settles again.

"Why are you losers sitting in a place with a broken aircon?" Jaemin asks.

"You're also here," Donghyuck points out. "That makes you a loser, too."

Jaemin shrugs, like being called a loser doesn't bother him in the slightest.

"I came for food," he admits.

"Same," Donghyuck reaches out his hand.

Jaemin dutifully grants him a high five. Jeno huffs in frustration.

"Can you two go ravage my kitchen, then? I have to finish this."

Jaemin shrugs and nods. His hand finds its way to Jeno's hair to tousle it. Then, he helps Donghyuck up and they disappear in the hallway. Jeno sighs. He feels strange without the weight of Donghyuck's leg on his thighs. 

He doesn't understand what's happening to him. He has never in his life been into anyone the way he is into Donghyuck. It's not even that he prefers girls; he doesn't prefer anyone. The only person, whose charming points Jeno could list has always been Jaemin. They're together all the time, they know each other like no one else does, and Jeno has had a lot of time to figure out what he likes in Jaemin and what he doesn't. Jaemin is interesting in a way no one else is, but it doesn't mean Jeno is automatically attracted to him. Not like he is to Donghyuck.  
Donghyuck got close to him in no time at all, digging up a place for himself in Jeno's soul and wriggling inside restlessly, until he was satisfied. It's been a month since Donghyuck barged into his life, the finals are here, Jeno really has to finish this last report, and he can't stop thinking about Donghyuck's damn legs. He doesn't get it. He had been fine without being into anyone for the last twenty one years. He has no idea what changed now.

Donghyuck's phone vibrates on the table and Jeno can't help glancing at it.

"Injun's calling!" he yells.

"Tell him I'm gonna call him back!" Donghyuck yells back.

It sounds odd and Jeno figures Donghyuck must be eating something already. He picks up the phone.

"Hi," he says with a sigh.

It's hot and he's tired and confused. At least school ends in three days and then all that's left are two exams.

"He's at your place again?" Renjun asks with a sigh of his own.

"Clearing out my fridge," Jeno confirms. "He said he'll call you back."

"Yeah, thanks," Renjun says. "How are your finals going?"

They talk for a while more about this and that. Jeno likes chatting with Renjun, he's glad Donghyuck's questionable acquaintance came with the added bonus of knowing Renjun. He's less glad that his messed up attraction sometimes has him thinking how nice it would be, if Donghyuck didn't have Renjun. He should probably talk to someone about it, sort it out into sensible words instead of this chaos of emotions he's never felt before in his life. The most natural bet would probably be Jaemin, but Jeno doesn't want to share this with him and he doesn't understand that part either. He should call Mark. They haven't talked all that often since Mark left to Canada last year, but Jeno knows Mark would hear him out and give him some good advice. Mark is kind like that. It was Mark who told him Jeno doesn't need to go out with anyone, if that's not what he wants. Jeno could probably list Mark's charming points, too.

Jeno puts away Donghyuck's phone just in time for Donghyuck and Jaemin to come back into the living room. Jaemin thrusts a glass full of something pink under Jeno's nose.

"Drink," he says.

Jeno does. It's a strawberry smoothie. Jeno would hug Jaemin in gratitude, if his thighs weren't plastered to the couch from incessant heat.

"We also found this," Donghyuck adds, passing Jeno some chips. "I have no idea how you can eat something this salty in this temperature, but go off, I guess."

Jeno takes the chips and stuffs a handful into his mouth. It makes Jeno feel nice, when Donghyuck shows that he know Jeno's little quirks like this. It feels like Donghyuck has been there almost as long as Jaemin. Jeno focuses on that instead of Donghyuck's smooth skin peeking out of his booty shorts. Jaemin sits next to him on the couch and groans at the uncomfortable feeling.

"Are you done yet?" he asks, nodding at Jeno's laptop.

Jeno was talking to Renjun, so no, he's not. Jaemin groans again, frustrated.

"I only have like, half a page left to write," Jeno tells him.

Jaemin has been in the house for less than twenty minutes, and Jeno knows he came here in his fancy, air-conditioned car straight from his fancy, air-conditioned apartment, but his hair is starting to cling to his temples, damp with sweat and almost golden in the afternoon sun.

"How was your exam?" Jeno asks.

Jaemin is free of the school year as of today, because he refuses to go to class anymore after he suffered through his last test. Jeno guesses that's fair. He intends to go in hopes of revising last minute for his own exams.

"I think I'll somehow pass," Jaemin grimaces. "It wasn't the peak of my intelligence, but I don't care anymore."

Donghyuck steals another sip of Jeno's smoothie, because he thinks Jeno didn't see him the first time, and grabs his phone.

"You two are boring," he announces. "I'm gonna go call Renjun, I don't wanna hear about school."

Donghyuck is also done for the year. Not that he cared all that much about it in the first place, but he passed everything and has been looking for a job for a week already.

"My grandma can only give me so much money," he said with a shrug, when Jeno asked him about his family. "Be careful," he added with an ominous smile. "I'll try to find a legal job like a good boy, but you know I'm not above using pretty morons like you to get what I want."

Jeno didn't know, if he should first react to the threat, to being called pretty, or to being called a moron. He didn't react at all in the end, too stunned by everything that is Lee Donghyuck. Donghyuck laughed at him then and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Jeno shouldn't be thinking about it for the nth time again now.

Donghyuck's tactics of using men are based on one thing only - acting vulnerable. Donghyuck explained it all once to Jeno and Jaemin. Men, especially older ones, love young, pretty people who are weak and lost. They can take care of them, act as their mentors and direct them wherever they want them to be. It's an awful ego boost, Donghyuck said with manic glee. Men will always think they're so much better, smarter and more intelligent than women or boys like Donghyuck. It's enough to fix a little pout on your face and pretend you're looking for guidance, Donghyuck added. They will give you everything, if they think you're too dumb to know what you want. Jeno was almost absolutely sure Donghyuck is a demon after that presentation. Jaemin told Donghyuck he'd easily get a well-played job in hell. Donghyuck patted their heads in a patronizing manner and whined Jaemin into making dinner for him. Jeno wanted to point out that Jaemin got caught literally right after getting an explanation on how _not_ to get caught, but Jaemin made dinner for him, too, so he couldn't make himself do it.

"Can't you be done already?" Jaemin complains, sinking down on the couch, until his chin digs into his sternum. He's wearing a sleeveless tee and Jeno catches a glimpse of his tanned ribs. "I'm bored. Let's play something after you finish this."

Jeno drags his gaze back to his laptop with more difficulty than he's used to. Maybe being attracted to Donghyuck suddenly made him notice other people's attractiveness, too. Or maybe it's just Jaemin, looking different than he has before, after those few months of hitting the pool. Jeno should really call Mark. In the meantime, he adds two more sentences to his report, makes himself read through it, despite words not registering in his brain at all, and decides to send it in as it is.

Jaemin cheers as enthusiastically as the temperature lets him for, which means he barely makes a triumphant sound.

"But we're playing that new horror game," Jeno says, glancing at Jaemin to make sure Jaemin realizes he's not going to win this one.

Jaemin opens his mouth, exhales noisily and sits up, parroting Jeno's words in an exaggerated way. Jeno grins. Donghyuck gets back, when they're messing with game controls. He sits on the floor, leaning back on Jeno's legs, and demands the first turn. His back is scorching hot against Jeno's skin and suddenly, Jeno wants to touch more. He's so completely unprepared for that thought, he throws himself into the game, ignoring Donghyuck's whining about his lost first turn and Jaemin's gaze on the side of his face that feels almost as hot as Donghyuck's back.

*****

Jaemin might not be the most observant guy on the planet, but surprisingly, he's better than Donghyuck. Unless Donghyuck knows and just doesn't care. It is a possibility, Jaemin wouldn't put it past him. Either way, Jaemin seems to be the only one paying attention to what's going on, and his observations are rather interesting.

He considers it all from three sides. 

The first one is Donghyuck's side. That's the easiest, because Donghyuck, as complicated as his actions might be, is in himself a pretty simple guy. Jaemin had his likes, dislikes, needs and urges down after two weeks of hanging out with him. Donghyuck wants attention, gets affection wherever he can, but he doesn't like being viewed as easy. He hates when things are too calm, is unapologetically gay, and needs to be surrounded by people like oxygen. Jaemin thinks he should be an actor. Donghyuck can lie and deceive like no one Jaemin has ever met. Jaemin and Jeno have both been wrapped around his pinky right from the start. Donghyuck has them exactly where he wanted them and they can't even be angry at him for it. Donghyuck challenges everyone he meets and deems them either worthy of being his or not. Jaemin and Jeno are his and there is no other way to say it. Donghyuck also wants someone to challenge him and that's why there is Renjun. Jaemin doesn't think anyone else could match Donghyuck's pace the way Renjun does. He can't imagine Donghyuck being with anyone else in the intimate sense.

That's how he gets to side number two of things. Jeno's side.

Jeno is complicated for two reasons. Firstly, he doesn't know what he wants. Secondly, he doesn't know how to even begin to find out. Jaemin and Jeno have been together for an obscene amount of time. Best friends to the grave. Jaemin can't picture himself not knowing Jeno. That's why, he can read Jeno like an open book. That's why, he knows what Jeno wants before Jeno himself does. The only problem is that he still hasn't found a suitable method of making Jeno realize. He tried telling him directly. _Here, Jeno, this is what you want, trust me._ Jeno does trust him, but he never believed him, when Jaemin told him that. _How can you know that?_ he'd say and Jaemin's chest would burn with frustration. _You're not me, how can you know that?_

Jaemin also tried tricking him into realizing the things Jeno wants, but that always backfired as well. And this thing, this uncertain, slippery thing with Donghyuck is even harder to pinpoint and let Jeno know about, despite it being his. Jaemin doesn't know what to do. Also for two reasons. Firstly, telling Jeno that he's interested in Donghyuck sexually and/or romantically sounds a lot harder to do than telling Jeno that yes, veterinary school is the right choice for him. Mostly because Jeno has never been interested in anyone that way. Secondly, Jaemin is having trouble dealing with his own feelings right now.

And that's how he gets to the third side of things. His own.

Jaemin is not a stranger to dating. He had a few girlfriends in his life and a good time with each of them. He's been single for about a year now, too lazy to look for someone, not interested enough in those he already knows. Women are beautiful and fearless, and Jaemin was always happy being with them. He had never considered he could also be into boys. Not until Donghyuck.

Every guy Jaemin has ever known was his friend, his bro, his bud, never potential love interest. Jaemin used to think it's because he's straight and there is nothing to question there. But then Donghyuck happened, with his pretty, plump lips and his sparkling eyes, his soft hands and slim legs. Donghyuck also happened with an awesome sense of humor and confidence Jaemin can't help but admire. Jaemin lost before he realized there was a game.

So now, the situation presents as follows:

Donghyuck has Renjun and doesn't give a flying fuck about anyone else being into him, unless he can get something out of it. (Usually, it's clothes or nice food, or money.) He can't get anything out of Jaemin or Jeno being into him, because they're already his friends, and Donghyuck's loyalty is the only thing evening the scale between him being a good person and a bad person.

Jeno wants Donghyuck, but he doesn't understand what's actually going on with his emotions. Jaemin can't tell in what sense Jeno wants Donghyuck, either, which further complicates things.

Jaemin wants Donghyuck, too, except he's fully aware of it, and the only thing he's struggling with is his sudden tipping towards bisexuality. He knows he can't have Donghyuck and he's okay with it, but it's still curious to him that he would find it in himself to be attracted to a dude after all this time.

Jaemin doesn't know how to proceed for the longest time, but then Jeno's exams are over, and they both decide to visit Renjun without letting him know. It's a minute decision, they do it just because his apartment is closer than Jaemin's, which means access to air conditioning without having to drive over half an hour in traffic. Jeno does knock, but Jaemin pulls the door open before getting an answer. Which is the single thing that pushes everything in a questionable direction, with the speed of someone falling down the stairs and gaining momentum as they go. It's how Jaemin feels, anyway, when he sees Donghyuck seated in Renjun's lap, shirtless and covered in love bites.

Renjun must get surprised, because before he raises his head to look at Jaemin and Jeno in his door, Donghyuck lets out something between a hiss and a moan. Jaemin almost hisses back in sympathy. That must have been a hard bite.

They all stare at each other for a long minute, and despite the air conditioning, the air is suffocating.

"Okay," Renjun says finally and slowly breathes out through his nose. "Which one of you wants to die first."

Jaemin gulps. He feels a bit dizzy. He should have drunk something more than two cups of coffee today, probably. Donghyuck's back is tantalizing and his neck is craned, as he's looking at them, and Jaemin has to bite the inside of his cheek in order to stop staring at Donghyuck's stupid, red, swollen, smug mouth. Of course Donghyuck finds the situation amusing.

Jeno makes a tiny sound next to him and Jaemin remembers it might be a lot worse for Jeno to witness this than for him. Donghyuck's smugness seems a lot crueler to him suddenly.

"Geez, sorry, sorry," he says easily, grabbing Jeno's wrist with one hand and the doorknob with the other. "You should have locked your door," he teases, showing Renjun and Donghyuck his tongue.

Renjun reaches for the closest available thing and Jaemin closes the door right before the picture frame he grabbed from beside the bed makes it across the room.

"Let's go to my place," Jaemin says to the door.

Jeno says nothing, lets Jaemin get them out of the apartment complex and into his car. He's silent during the entire ride and Jaemin glances at him every once and again, but Jeno's face is weirdly blank. Jaemin isn't used to it. He's used to Jeno smiling, or looking like he's smiling even when he's not.

"Have you talked to Mark?" Jaemin asks him, parking the car.

Jeno blinks a few times, waking up from his daze, and slowly turns to look at Jaemin.

"Huh?" is all he says.

Jaemin is usually endeared when Jeno is confused, but right now he's mostly worried.

"Get out of the car," Jaemin tells him.

Jeno does. He doesn't walk until Jaemin grabs his wrist again and pulls him along. The apartment isn't too warm even without the air conditioning turned on, but Jaemin gets it going anyway. Jeno flops down on the couch lifelessly. Jaemin clucks his tongue and walks over to the kitchen to get them both something to drink. He puts a glass of ice water into Jeno's hand and watches until Jeno drinks it all. Then, he picks Mark's number.

"You're gonna pay millions, calling me like this," is the first thing Mark says. Jaemin kind of forgot Mark's in Canada and he and Jeno are very much not, but whatever, it's not like he doesn't have money. Mark seems to have kind of forgotten he's in Canada, too, and that they haven't talked in at least two weeks now, because he quickly adds a, "Yo, what's up?"

"Things happened," Jaemin says.

"Thanks, that explains everything," Mark says.

"Shut up. It's about Donghyuck."

Jeno didn't make a single move that would indicate he even noticed Jaemin talking to someone, but he flinches a little at Donghyuck's name. Jaemin sighs.

"Oh," Mark says. He knows all about Donghyuck from Jaemin. "Is he okay?"

He doesn't mean Donghyuck and they both know that, so there is no need to clarify.

"I wouldn't be calling, if he was," Jaemin says. "Just talk to him, okay?"

"Yeah, man," Mark agrees immediately. "Of course."

Jaemin puts the phone to Jeno's ear and Jeno holds it instinctively. Jaemin kind of wants to know what Jeno tells Mark, but eavesdropping would be an ass move. He goes back to the kitchen and turns on the radio Chenle bought for him as a housewarming gift, except he had to grab the pinkest monstrosity there was. Jaemin loves pink, though, so even though it's also sparkly, he wasn't annoyed by the present as much as Chenle would have probably liked. Some nice pop is playing and Jaemin busies himself making lunch for himself and Jeno. It's nothing fancy, just some fried vegetables and rice, since it's way too hot to be eating a proper meal. Jaemin thinks of making hamburgers in the evening, when it's cooler. He tunes out Jeno's and Mark's conversation completely and almost startles when a pair of arms circles his waist.

"Food," Jeno says.

His voice is hoarse, but Jaemin knows he didn't cry. Jeno rarely ever cries, he definitely wouldn't do it out of confusion.

"Welcome back to the world of the living," Jaemin says.

Jeno's arms tighten around him and Jaemin's heart gives a few heavy thumps that resonate throughout his ribcage.

"Wash your hands," Jaemin says too softly.

Jeno lets him go in order to do what he's told. He looks drained, when Jaemin glances back at him, as Jeno sits at the table.

"Better?" Jaemin asks, putting a plate full of food in front of him.

Jeno nods, rubs his eye and Jaemin almost coos at him. He would, in any other situation. Jeno would glare at him and let it go in the face of food, in any other situation. Right now, everything seems a little too sharp and sensitive, like a sunny day after a night of drinking.

"I have to do some research, but I think I know what's going on with me now," Jeno says, which is honestly more than Jaemin expected him to share right now.

"That's awesome," Jaemin nods.

"Thanks," Jeno mumbles. He looks up at Jaemin for the first time since he showed up in the kitchen and his eyes are big and sincere, tired. "I would probably never talk to him, if you didn't make me."

"Hey, best friend, remember?" Jaemin points at himself with a grin. "I know what you need even when you don't."

Jeno huffs a laugh and starts eating finally. Like always, his mood improves magically after food. They lie down on the floor and talk about nothing, and do nothing until it gets dark, and then Jaemin makes them food again.

"You gonna tell me sometime, right?" Jaemin asks, when they're sprawled on the couch, heads on opposite ends, legs tangled.

Jeno's legs aren't as smooth and slim as Donghyuck's. They're muscled and pale, and so long, even though he doesn't wear shorts as short as Donghyuck's. Jaemin looks at them for a while, contemplative. He might actually prefer them to Donghyuck's.

Jeno cocks his head to the side, considering. Then, he sits up and Jaemin feels weird without his body heat so close to himself.

"Mark said there is a word for people like me," Jeno says. Jaemin didn't expect him to talk right away. "He thinks I can only be into someone I know well. And it's apparently not that rare."

"You know me well," Jaemin points out.

"I've known you forever, that doesn't count," Jeno clucks his tongue. "Besides, I don't think it's that I'm into every single person I'm close to. That would be crazy. It would be kinda like you dating every single girl you meet just because you meet them."

"I guess," Jaemin agrees.

"Mark just thinks I have to get to know someone first in order to consider them romantically. Or sexually. Or whatever."

"That makes sense," Jaemin allows. "If it makes you feel better about yourself."

He doesn't mention Donghyuck and Jeno doesn't either. They watch whatever action movie plays on TV. Jeno falls asleep and Jaemin texts his mother that Jeno is going to stay over at his place. Jeno's mother texts back that it's fine and reminds Jaemin to drink other things than coffee. Jaemin feels warm and decides to text his own mother with updates on his life. His mother calls him and Jaemin escapes to the kitchen to answer. 

When he comes back, Jeno has repositioned himself to curl on the freed up space. Jeno is as tall as Jaemin and broader than him, but he always makes himself small, when he sleeps. Jaemin fucks around on Twitter for a while and then wakes Jeno up to make him take out his contacts.

Jeno barely knows what's going on around him, but he obediently goes to the bathroom. He's at Jaemin's place so often, he could probably find the bathroom in his sleep. Jaemin even keeps a spare bottle of contact lenses' resolution specifically for when Jeno stays over without planning on it. Jaemin leans back on a wall in the hallway, because Jeno won't see shit once he exits the bathroom, and Jaemin would rather Jeno didn't break something accidentally on his way to the bedroom.

Jeno takes the t-shirt Jaemin gives him and pulls it on, and Jaemin watches his toned chest shift in the process. He wonders, if it's just about Donghyuck, or if he's really bi and never noticed. He wonders, if he would be able to kiss Jeno without it being weird.

They crawl into the bed and drift off almost immediately. Jaemin decides to do his own research.

*****

"I wasn't in love with him," Jeno blurts out instead of hi one stormy afternoon.

They're in the gas station store he works at. The sky looks dark, as if it was nine in the evening and not barely five in the afternoon. The store is unsurprisingly empty. Jaemin pauses in the middle of making a step and blinks at him dumbly. Jeno bites the inside of his cheek, as mild panic seizes his insides. Why the hell would he say that? He already talked to Mark. It's been three weeks since he found out more or less what had been going on with him. He hasn't seen Donghyuck in four days, but it's not like he's avoiding him. Things are perfectly fine between them, even though Jeno thinks he still might be harboring his crush a little. It's unexpectedly hard to let go of it. Jaemin has been nothing, if not quietly supportive. Jeno should be showing him he's better already, not this, whatever this is. Jeno wonders, if it's Donghyuck himself that's keeping him hooked, or if it's Jeno's curiosity in the face of being attracted to a person for the first time in his life.

"I know," Jaemin says. It sounds so simple. Jeno grits his teeth. If he wasn't in love, he should be over it by now. "You wanna know why you're stuck, Jen?" Jaemin asks then.

Jeno hates and loves this ability of his to read Jeno's mind.

"Why," he mumbles.

Jaemin stops in front of him on the other side of the counter.

"It's not about Donghyuck at all," Jaemin says. "You want to experience stuff, now that you know you could without getting grossed out. That's it. You're thinking too much again."

A lightning strikes outside, illuminating Jaemin's face for a fraction of a second. His eyelashes are so long, Jeno thinks absently. Jeno knows that Jaemin is right, but something in him decides to be stubborn about it, some stupid defiance that only ever complicates things.

"Okay," he says, then adds, unnecessarily, "There is no chance for that, anyway, so I should just let it go."

Jaemin leans on the counter, his biceps bulging slightly to keep him upright, and Jeno thinks, suddenly, that if it was Jaemin, maybe he could–

"What if there was?" Jaemin asks. "A chance, I mean. Does it have to be Donghyuck?"

Right now, Jeno definitely hates Jaemin's ability. His face burns, when he averts his gaze from Jaemin's big, knowing eyes. The air is awfully humid and charged between the two of them. Thunder rolls over their heads and the sound makes Jeno shiver.

"I guess not," Jeno admits slowly.

"You didn't notice," Jaemin huffs, more resigned than amused.

Jeno frowns down at him. Jaemin messes up his hair. A droplet of sweat rolls down his neck and Jeno follows it with his eyes.

"Didn't notice what?"

"You're not the only one who got caught in Donghyuck's trap," Jaemin says quietly.

Jeno stares at him blankly, until realization sinks in. Guilt ties his stomach into a tight knot and panic burns in his throat.

"What? Jaemin, you're straight, there is no way that you- shit, I didn't even stop to think about it! Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it? Sorry I've been such a shitty best friend, when you took care of me like that, too, I'm-"

"Jeno," Jaemin grins and there is that expression full of long lasting affection on his face. At the beginning, Jeno thought Jaemin looked at him like this only when he thought Jeno is being a dumbass, but maybe they're one and the same thing in the end. "I'm fine. It's not like I was in love with him, either."

"But you're-" Jeno starts and stops immediately. It doesn't matter that they both thought Jaemin was straight. Jeno thought he didn't swing at all, after all. "Are you over it?"

Jaemin shrugs nonchalantly, but Jeno knows when there is something that's troubling him.

"Nana."

Jaemin looks up at him from under his long eyelashes and Jeno understands what all the girls see in him, despite not knowing him like Jeno does.

"I think I might be bi," Jaemin admits. "It's kinda the same as your thing. Donghyuck was my big awakening, but I'm more curious about myself now, since I know I can't have him."

Jaemin can speak so boldly about these stuff. Jeno still isn't even sure, if he really did want Donghyuck, or if it was something else entirely. His face still feels hot, but the uncomfortable pressure in his gut has eased. Rain hits the windows, building up from small dribble to a powerful downfall; the air is still stuffy, though. Jeno hopes it won't be for long. Jaemin's fingers tap a rhythm on the counter. Jeno swallows heavily and considers getting out his water bottle.

"It's good that you're okay," he says. "But Jesus, we're both pretty stupid, huh."

Jaemin clucks his tongue and that gets Jeno's gaze back to his face. Jaemin looks annoyed.

"Let's get back to the beginning," he says pointedly, but Jeno doesn't know what the point is supposed to be, so he waits. "We're both curious and Donghyuck is unavailable. I want to experience things, too. What do you say we experience them together? Like, you know, for science?"

Jeno thinks there must be something wrong with his brain for a minute. Jaemin's face doesn't change, though, and nothing else crazy happens, so Jeno says, "What?"

Jaemin sighs heavily, messes his hair up even more.

"You said you can only be into someone you know well, right? Can you be into me enough to do this? We could experiment together, just out of curiosity. I'd find out how different it is to being with a girl and maybe if I like it enough to actually find a boyfriend. And you'd know how it feels to touch someone, and if you want to be with someone at all or not. We could be thinking about Donghyuck during it or something. Is that too fucked up?" when Jeno can't bring himself to answer, Jaemin answers himself, "It probably is, huh."

"Okay," Jeno says abruptly. "Let's do it."

Jaemin straightens.

"Seriously?"

Jeno shrugs, even though the whole idea makes him shake with nervous anticipation.

"Thinking about Donghyuck would be kinda fucked up for me, so I'm not gonna do that, but like, doing stuff just to try it out seems interesting. And I trust you."

Jaemin blinks a few times, staring. Then, he grins.

"Awesome! You can call it off anytime, okay? Now gimme that gum that I can't find in any normal damn store in this town."

Jeno rolls his eyes and reaches for the strange chewing gum he's not sure where came from. He hadn't seen it either until he started working here. Jaemin buys it every time he comes by, which means at least once every few days. Jeno doesn't mind. He likes it that Jaemin visits him despite being able to laze around his nice apartment all day, because he doesn't really need to work.

"Dude, I have this awesome new movie, you coming over tonight to watch it?" Jaemin says at one point, after a whole discussion whether Pepsi and Coca-Cola are different when it comes to the taste or not.

"My shift ends at eleven, man, you don't mind me coming over so late?" Jeno asks, because he always does, even though he knows what Jaemin will say.

"Are you an idiot? Of course it's fine, it's summer vacation, I'm not gonna go to sleep at ten or something."

"You don't go to sleep at ten even during the school year," Jeno reminds him.

"Exactly!" Jaemin says to that.

Despite making a deal about doing sexual stuff together, it's not awkward at all, and that tiny anxious thing in Jeno's chest has disappeared by the time Jaemin leaves to grab some food for dinner. 

At eleven, Jeno switches with the guy working the night shift, gets into his shitty car and drives over to Jaemin's place, sending a quick text to his mom on his way up the stairs. He got caught by the constant heavy rain walking to the car and then to Jaemin's apartment building, so his hair and shoulders are damp. He shivers in the stairway from the sudden drop in the temperature and lets himself into Jaemin's apartment.

"I'm here!" he calls out, toeing off his shoes. Jaemin emerges from the bathroom and throws a towel at his head. "Dude!"

"It's still raining, right?" Jaemin says.

Jeno grumbles under his breath, as he towels his hair without another complaint. Jaemin tells him to heat up whatever food he bought for himself before, since it was way too much. Jeno knows Jaemin only bought too much for his sake and it makes something in his chest glow. He has no idea how he would survive without Jaemin in his life.

They watch the movie and it is awesome. Jeno can't shut up about it for at least fifteen minutes after it ends and Jaemin indulges him happily. Jeno barely appreciates the movies Jaemin likes, so it's a special occasion, after all. Then, Jaemin makes them iced coffee, Jeno scolds him for consuming so much caffeine, and they settle back on the couch to the background noise of whatever reality show is playing on TV.

The air conditioning isn't on, but thanks to the rain it's easy to breathe tonight. They talk idly about whatever and then fall into a comfortable silence. And then, Jaemin says, "Hey, let's do it now."

"Do what?" Jeno asks, lazy because of feeling comfortable. 

Jaemin throws him a look. Oh.

_Oh._

"Uh, wait, but that's, do it just like that?" Jeno panics.

"Why, it doesn't matter when, right?" Jaemin shrugs.

"But don't we have to like, prepare anything or," Jeno protests.

His heart is suddenly pounding.

"What do you wanna prepare for a kiss?" Jaemin asks.

Jeno blinks.

"Um."

Jaemin sits up slowly, as a mischievous grin grows on his face.

"What did you think we were gonna do?" he asks slyly.

Jeno's face must be beet red.

"Nothing," he says, voice thin.

Jaemin leans towards him with a smug smirk and Jeno backs up into the armrest instinctively.

"Jen," Jaemin says. His voice is hoarse and Jeno thinks that it's not fair. "Can I kiss you?"

Jeno is pretty sure his heart will punch right through his chest any second now. He nods, too flustered for words. Jaemin gets even closer, but before he does what he's supposed to do, he huffs a small laugh and his eyes crinkle. Jeno has never seen it from such a close proximity. He doesn't know how to feel about it.

"Relax," Jaemin murmurs. "Just a kiss. If it feels gross, push me away. Just don't scream, if you intend to freak out. It's after one, my neighbors are gonna give me shit for it."

Jeno scowls at that and Jaemin uses that moment to press his lips to Jeno's own. It's... nothing much. Jeno doesn't know what it's supposed to feel like. It's not gross, definitely, but it's just skin on skin. Jaemin's lips are chapped, because he can't be bothered to buy lip balm even with how humid the air has been for like, the last two months. Jeno guesses it's not bad. It's definitely less strange than that time he held hands with the girl who confessed to him in first year of high school. Jaemin smells nice. Jeno's heart is still wild, but it's not what he expected.

Jaemin pulls away an inch to look at him.

"And?" he asks.

Jeno shrugs.

"Not sure. Is that how kissing is supposed to feel?"

Jaemin huffs another laugh, not unkind.

"Not really. That was only to get you used to it. Were you uncomfortable?"

"No," Jeno says. "It was a bit weird, but not bad or anything."

"Okay," Jaemin smiles. He's pretty, Jeno thinks. In a rather objective sense, of course. "Now open your mouth for me."

Jeno's brain malfunctions. He pushes Jaemin away by a hand to the face, hiding his own in the free one. Jaemin splutters and fights to get away from the assault.

"What the hell, man!"

"You can't just say something like that!" Jeno protests. 

His face feels so hot. In fact, his whole body feels hot. Jaemin makes an indignant sound, then he wrenches Jeno's hand away from his face to make him look. He's grinning again.

"Are you embarrassed?" he teases and then coos, "Aww, our Jeno is so cute!"

Jeno pushes him away again, something hot dropping to the pit of his stomach.

"You can't say something like that, either!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jaemin laughs, trapping Jeno's hand to stop him from doing the same thing again. "I say that all the time!"

"But not in this kind of situation!" Jeno whines, mortified. "Are you an idiot? Stupid Nana!"

"So what, I can't think you're cute now that you let me kiss you? Isn't that the opposite of what should be happening?"

"How should I know!" Jeno grumbles. "I'm new at this, remember? Anyway, I'll do whatever you want, if you don't say weird shit like that. Just tell me normally."

Jaemin's face changes and Jeno doesn't understand it.

"What?" he asks, suspicious.

Jaemin's grin returns.

"Nothing. Do what I said, then."

Jeno takes a deep breath and does open his mouth, just a little. He feels dumb doing it, but Jaemin doesn't leave him hanging for long. His fingers close around Jeno's jaw and he fits their lips together again, but his own are a little open, too, and that changes _everything_. Jeno closes his eyes. The chapped skin sliding against his own feels good now, everything that Jaemin does with his mouth feels good. Jeno relaxes underneath him and Jaemin notices, because his tongue is suddenly slipping past Jeno's lips, smooth and hot. A shiver racks down Jeno's spine and he tries his best to mimic whatever Jaemin's doing. Jaemin withdraws, nibbles on Jeno's lower lip, slots their mouths together just right and Jeno would have fallen on his ass, if he wasn't already half lying on Jaemin's couch, his muscles have gone to shit.

Jaemin moves away abruptly, panting a little. Jeno watches him, his eyelids heavy. Jaemin's ears and neck are pink and Jeno wants to bite.

"What?" he asks instead.

"You good? I didn't know, if the noise was a good one or a bad one," Jaemin says.

His hand is still around Jeno's face. Jeno flushes again.

"There was a noise?!" he mumbles.

Great, and he thought he couldn't be any more embarrassing. Jaemin blinks and then giggles.

"Oh my god, you're adorable!" he exclaims.

Jeno punches his arm, humiliated and angry.

"You were supposed to stop saying these things!" he growls.

He kind of wants Jaemin to kiss him again.

"Sorry, sorry," Jaemin laughs. "Anyway, how was it?"

"Shut the hell up! Like you don't already know that!" Jeno huffs. "What about you?"

Jaemin hums in thought. His fingertips are tickling the skin on Jeno's neck.

"It wasn't all that different from kissing a girl," Jaemin says finally.

"Yeah, lips are lips," Jeno agrees. Then, reluctantly, "Were you thinking about Donghyuck?"

"Nah, you were right, it's too fucked up," Jaemin dismisses.

Jeno wants to ask him, if he would kiss another boy, now that he knows how it feels, but he doesn't. It feels weird to be thinking about it. Jeno's chest twinges with that familiar, but unidentified thing he doesn't know how to begin understanding.

"You have work tomorrow?" Jaemin asks next.

"No, tomorrow's off," Jeno says, sitting up once Jaemin leaves his personal space.

"Let's grab the brats and go to the lake, then," Jaemin suggests. "Maybe Hyuck and Renjun will come, too."

"Yeah," Jeno mumbles. "Sure."

It makes him think about Mark and the fact that he's all the way over in Canada.

"What's up?" Jaemin asks.

His hand goes to Jeno's head on autopilot to ruffle his hair.

"Nothin'," Jeno mutters. "I kinda miss Mark, I guess."

"Yeah," Jaemin says quietly. "Me, too. But he's gonna be here in just a week. Hey, I bet he's gonna come back all hot. Maybe I should try hitting on him, now that I'm officially not straight."

Jeno knows Jaemin is joking, especially that Mark has a boyfriend now, but it doesn't seem funny to him. Which is strange, because picturing Mark's sudden glow up should be hilarious.

"Maybe you should," he agrees, going for a neutral tone of voice.

Jaemin frowns slightly at that response, but his expression clears soon enough and he doesn't comment.

"Let's go to sleep. We're gonna need all the energy in the world for a whole day with those little bastards."

*****

"Something's different," is the first thing Chenle says, when Jaemin picks him up in the morning.

"Shut up and get in the car or you won't get ice cream," Jeno tells him from the front seat.

Chenle opens his mouth, closes it and gets into the car. Jeno reaches to the portable refrigerator sitting on the floor between his legs and passes him his well-deserved ice cream. Jaemin sighs in relief. Crisis averted. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to meet the brats a day after kissing Jeno, after all. Jaemin just thought it wouldn't impact their relationship in a way other people would notice, because he's obviously a dumbass. Jeno's flushed face flickers before his eyes and he closes them to get a grip. Everything is messed up. This is not what he signed up for. 

"What the hell is with you two?" Jisung asks, when Jaemin picks him up.

"Ha! I knew it," says Chenle.

Jaemin curses their intuition. Jeno promises Jisung ice cream, if he shuts up, too. Jisung shrugs and takes it. Jaemin knows Chenle is potentially a much bigger threat, because Jisung usually just doesn't care enough about other people's problems. Chenle is thirsty for gossip. One ice cream cone won't shut him up for long.

Jeno is cranky, because it's early, hot, and he didn't really have much chance to sleep off yesterday's shift. Jaemin thinks he's cute like that, personally, but won't risk saying it.

"Renjun is coming, too?" Chenle asks, sighing in content, once Jaemin switches on the air conditioning.

"Yeah, they're both coming," Jeno says.

He thinks for a second and then grabs ice cream for himself, too. Jaemin doesn't really know what's happening and while he had it mostly figured out already, yesterday kicked everything askew and he's back to square one. He has no idea how he's going to react upon seeing Donghyuck. He should maybe talk to Renjun. They've gotten incredibly close lately and Jaemin knows Renjun would at least hear him out, maybe even offer some advice. He decides to find a moment today, while the others are busy.

"The Satan is coming, too?" Jisung complains, even though he loves Donghyuck.

It even turned out he had known him before Jaemin and Jeno did, because they both attended the same club in high school.

"Yup," Jeno pops the p and he sounds so disgruntled, Jaemin has to grip the steering wheel to hold back from pinching his cheek.

"You don't sound all that happy about it," Chenle remarks.

"Another word and no more ice cream for you," Jeno says.

"Changing tactics," Chenle nods. "Smart, I wouldn't fall for the same thing twice."

Jeno only sighs. Jaemin feels a bit bad that he pulled him out to play at the lake so early in the morning, but only up to the moment when they reach their destination. Jeno strips as soon as he gets out of the car. He's gotten a bit tanned from all those times Jaemin or Donghyuck dragged him out to sunbathe, but compared to Jaemin, he's still pale. His torso is something Jaemin saw hundreds of times already, but it feels like he never really _looked_ at it, because right now, seeing it makes his heart trip over itself. Jeno's body is more toned than Jaemin's, thanks to joining a gymnastics club two years ago. Jaemin always knew that Jeno is hot, but he's never wanted to touch his bare skin like he does now.

"Wake up, Nana, are you having a stroke?"

Jaemin blinks and Jisung's face comes into focus way too close to his own. He moves back, clucking his tongue. Thank fuck blushing isn't his first reaction to being caught at ogling his best friend's naked chest. Jisung's face is already way too smug, Jaemin doesn't want to even imagine what would happen, if the younger saw him getting red. He pinches Jisung's cheek as a form of retaliation and also fulfilling that urge he had in the car at the same time.

"Is Sungie worried for Nana?" he coos and as expected, Jisung bats his hand away with a disgusted grimace.

"Fine, don't tell me what's going on and suffer in silence," he hisses.

Jaemin would hug him, but it's way too hot. He settles for ruffling the short, copper hair.

"I'll tell you some other time, yeah? I still don't really know what's going on, to be honest."

Jisung scrunches up his nose and sniffs.

"Fine," he allows.

"Hey, you losers coming?" Chenle calls out to them, already halfway across the sandy beach.

Jaemin would prefer, if they camped out on the grass a little ways down, and is already opening his mouth to tell Chenle that, but he doesn't have to. Jeno knows that perfectly well and is heading for the spot Jaemin had in mind already, with the refrigerator in his hand, his back glistening with sweat in the unforgiving sun. Well, now that Jaemin notices, he wouldn't be able to yell anything anyway, since his throat goes dry immediately.

Isn't this way too sudden? Sure, he acknowledged that he's into Donghyuck more than a month ago, but being into Donghyuck shouldn't automatically mean being into his hot best friend after fifteen fucking years of knowing him. Right? Is this because he fully accepted he's not straight? Is this because they kissed and Jaemin wouldn't imagine Donghyuck's plumper lips instead of Jeno's? Is it because the sound Jeno made and how he melted under Jaemin's hands woke up that familiar, hungry for another body thing hidden deep in Jaemin's gut? He hasn't gotten laid in more than a year now. Maybe he's just frustrated?

"Huh," Jisung says next to him.

He grabs his and Chenle's bags, because of course Chenle would use their distraction to get away without carrying anything at all, and starts after the other two. _Huh_ seems fitting, Jaemin thinks, taking the bundle of blankets and towels left in the trunk and the other refrigerator he had packed full of food.

Jeno and Chenle are already in the water by the time Jaemin reaches their spot.

"Hey, at least put on sunscreen!" he yells, but they ignore him in favor of splashing water at each other. Jeno looks good wet, Jaemin thinks and screeches to an immediate halt in his head, just to quickly backpedal. 

He's definitely frustrated. Jeno hadn't even kissed anyone until last night, there is no way they can just have sex right off the bat. Besides, Jaemin knows way too little about doing it with another guy to jump right into it. Jaemin grits his teeth. It was probably a stupid idea to make a deal like that with Jeno in the first place.

Donghyuck and Renjun arrive not five minutes later and Jaemin is about to grab Renjun to consult him about his poor life choices, but Donghyuck gets one look at him and says, "We're going for a walk, loser. Move."

Jaemin wants to protest, but Renjun nudges him along and Donghyuck grabs his arm to drag him away.

"What did you do?" Donghyuck asks, when they're a considerable distance away from the rest.

"Nothing," Jaemin mumbles.

"Don't sulk," Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "Are you five? Come on, tell me what you did. You looked like the world was ending just now. Is it about Jeno having a crush on me?"

"So you noticed," Jaemin mutters.

He feels dejected and it's all his own fault. Donghyuck scoffs, condescending.

"Of course I noticed. I just thought it's because he's never met a gay person before and that's what it was about. Like, a fascination and nothing more. Isn't he asexual?"

Jaemin considers that for a minute.

"He kinda is? Like at least halfway. I'm sure there is a word for it."

"Uh, yeah?" Donghyuck's voice drips with disdain. "Demisexual?"

Jaemin groans in frustration.

"Don't fucking judge me, I've only been reading about this stuff for like, a week."

Donghyuck fakes a shocked face. Jaemin narrows his eyes.

"What."

Donghyuck covers his mouth with his hand theatrically.

"You can read?!"

"You know what, fuck you," Jaemin grumbles.

He knew a conversation with Donghyuck would end up being like this. Donghyuck grins.

"With pleasure, if you're not scared of Renjun coming after your ass," he sing-songs.

"I swear, Hyuck, I'm gonna deck you."

Donghyuck hums, pleased with himself for getting Jaemin so annoyed.

"You wouldn't. I didn't know what was up with Jeno, exactly, but I definitely knew that _you_ were into me. How could you even think you're straight at any point in your life? You radiate dumb bisexual bitch energy."

Jaemin groans. They stop at a little pier and Donghyuck leans on the railing. His golden skin almost glows in the sun, but it's no longer doing the same things to Jaemin as it was just a few days ago.

"Answer the question," Donghyuck says. Gentle breeze messes up his red hair. He's breathtaking. "What did you do?"

"I kissed him," Jaemin says before he remembers himself.

Donghyuck drags his heavy gaze from the horizon to Jaemin's face.

"So what's the problem here? Is it that he was affected and you weren't?" Donghyuck asks. He pauses and his next words make something in Jaemin's stomach drop. "Or is it the other way round?"

Jaemin gulps. He hates it when Donghyuck does that. Donghyuck sighs and then pushes Jaemin into the lake. Jaemin comes up spluttering, prepared to shout at Donghyuck for being a dick, but realizes Donghyuck jumped in after him.

"Don't make a fuss," he says, pulling Jaemin behind the pier.

It's good that the area is moderately empty, because Donghyuck pins him against one of the pillars and gets all up in his face.

"Wait," Jaemin panics. "What the fuck are you doing, Renjun-"

"Renjun knows me _really_ well," Donghyuck drawls out and it somehow sounds dangerous, coupled with that smirk of his. "Don't worry, I'll talk to him later. What, you wanted Chenle to see us and be even more annoying than usual?"

Jaemin wants to say that that's not the point, but Donghyuck kisses him then. Jaemin blanks out. It feels good, Donghyuck clearly knows what he's doing, unlike Jeno. Unlike every girl Jaemin has ever kissed, too, probably. His stomach swoops and it feels like he'd sink, if Donghyuck wasn't keeping him up. It's feels good, but it's not what Jaemin wants.

Donghyuck pulls away, licks his lips and says, "You're welcome."

Jaemin kind of wants to punch him, but he knows what Donghyuck was trying to do here, so he settles for glaring. 

They go back to the rest, dripping wet, and Jaemin avoids Renjun's calculating gaze. Chenle seems to be thinking hard what's happening, but Jisung glances at Jaemin once only to shrug and communicate wordlessly that he'll wait until Jaemin's ready to talk. Jeno is looking between Jaemin and Donghyuck with suspicion, but he doesn't say anything, either. It's too normal after that. They swim, eat, laugh, tease each other and talk, and the day passes before they know it.

Donghyuck and Renjun leave first and judging by their behavior for the last hour, Jaemin knows exactly what they're going to do once they get home. He drives the rest back and tries not to think about either set of lips he kissed during the last twenty four hours.

*

A day before Mark is supposed to return, Jeno lets himself into Jaemin's apartment and pins Jaemin to the kitchen counter.

"Do something," he whines.

Jaemin nods, stunned, but Jeno doesn't wait for him to get a grip, kisses Jaemin first. He's better at it than Jaemin thought he could be after having done it only once, but Jaemin's patience ends quickly and he grabs Jeno's hips, pulling him closer and taking the control from him. Jeno sags against him with a sigh that Jaemin swallows. Jaemin's brain fries, because Jeno doesn't want to be in charge, he prefers to give it over to Jaemin, and Jaemin wants to _ruin him_.

He breaks the kiss and Jeno hides his face in Jaemin's neck, leaning heavily on him. Jaemin resists the urge to bite into his shoulder, holds him steady.

"What do you want?" he asks, breathless.

Jeno nuzzles into his skin and Jaemin has to grit his teeth to hold himself back from- from everything he wants to do right now.

"I don't know," Jeno says, his breath hot where it hits Jaemin's collarbone.

"More than a kiss?" Jaemin asks next, because they have to be on the same page here.

"What does that mean?"

Jaemin feels too urgent to explain everything they could do.

"Just push me away or punch me, if it's too much, okay?"

Jeno nods and that's all Jaemin needs to drag him into the bedroom. Jeno's quiet, as he lands on his back on the bed, watching Jaemin with half lidded eyes. Jaemin straddles his hips and holds his face, fitting their mouths together again. Jeno's hands end up in Jaemin's hair, tugging lightly on the strands, and Jaemin groans appreciatively. He wants nothing more than to hump Jeno just like this until they both cum, but Jeno would probably never speak to him again, if he did that.

He pulls away from Jeno's mouth again, taking in his flushed face and swollen lips, and moves down to lick and suck on his neck. Jeno shivers violently, letting out a strangled sound and Jaemin grins to himself. Jeno's fingers tighten in his hair, when Jaemin sneaks his hands under Jeno's t-shirt, skimming up his sides and toned abdomen. Jaemin notices the differences between Jeno and the girls now, but it's not that he prefers it this way or the other, it's just not the same thing. Then again, each of those girls was different to all the others, too. And Jeno is different to literally anything and everything else Jaemin has ever experienced.

It's nice to touch Jeno's smooth skin and feel the hard muscles underneath, to explore his body with all its sharp angles instead of soft curves. Jeno arches his back, when Jaemin squeezes his nipples, and Jaemin feels like something just hit him in the head.

"Jen," he pants, nibbling on Jeno's collarbone. "Jen, can I take off your shirt?"

Jeno is trembling a little and his breathing is harsh. He won't meet Jaemin's eyes.

"Yeah," he allows, voice hoarse. "Yeah, okay."

"Hey," Jaemin says, cupping his cheek to make him look. "You okay? Do you want me to stop? Does it feel gross?"

Jeno shakes his head.

"It's not gross," he mumbles, biting down on his lip. His gaze is chaotic. "It's just, uh, kinda scary? And kinda embarrassing, I- I don't really know what to do with myself."

Jaemin smiles down at him, relieved. He leans in to peck his cheek, then his lips a few times.

"You don't have to do anything with yourself," he assures. "Let me do stuff and you just enjoy it. Or not. I mean, it's not like you have to enjoy it, but tell me in that case, yeah?"

"Yeah," Jeno breathes.

"Was that too fast?" Jaemin asks, caressing his face softly. "Which part was scary?"

Jeno groans and hides his red face in his hands. Jaemin's chest swells with affection to the point, where it gets hard to breathe.

"I'm not surprised that all those girls slept with you anymore," Jeno says.

It's muffled into his hands.

"You were surprised before?" Jaemin asks, faux offended. "I'm the best in bed, of course they wanted to sleep with me!"

Jeno moves one of his hands from his face to punch Jaemin's arm. Jaemin grins and catches both of them to be able to look Jeno in the eye. Jeno is scowling.

"Stop being a self-absorbed bastard and take off my damn t-shirt," he grumbles.

Even his neck is red now. Jaemin wants to mark it up. They're not together, he reminds himself. Jeno would be pissed, if Jaemin left any hickeys.

Jaemin sits up and racks Jeno's t-shirt up to his chin with a slow, purposeful slide of his hands. Jeno's breath hitches and Jaemin would laugh at how much he's blushing, if he wasn't so turned on. He pulls the t-shirt over Jeno's head carefully and then he looks, really looks at Jeno's heaving chest and quivering stomach.

Jeno chokes on a moan when Jaemin's tongue flicks his nipple.

"Nana!" Jeno gasps at Jaemin's fingertips ghosting over his skin.

Jaemin wants to hear it again, but he's not sure when it's all going to be too much. He's already half hard in his basketball shorts and he really, really wants to get off, but Jeno said it's scary. Jaemin can't go too far.

"Wait," Jeno breathes, circling Jaemin's neck with his arms and pulling him close until they're flash against one another.

Jeno is half hard too. It should be weird for Jaemin, because he's not used to more than his own dick in bed, but it only turns him on more. There is barely any blood left in his head.

"That's," Jeno starts. "Can we stop for now?"

"Yeah," Jaemin agrees instantly, turning his head to leave a kiss on Jeno's jaw. "Sure we can."

"And can you," Jeno pauses again and mumbles the rest, "Can you kiss me again?"

Jaemin's brain explodes. How can Jeno be this adorable? Jaemin raises himself on his forearms and studies Jeno's face from barely any distance at all. Jeno avoids his gaze and grimaces.

"Don't be so embarrassing, dumbass," he mutters. "Just do it."

Jaemin grins down at him and pecks his lips.

"You were supposed to push me away, not hug me," he says right before slotting their mouths together at just the right angle for Jeno to shiver.

Jaemin loses himself in the sensations a little and doesn't manage to hold back the moan ripping out of his throat when Jeno scratches down his back. They break apart, staring at each other, Jeno in surprise, Jaemin in horror. Then, Jeno grins and it looks so ominous, Jaemin automatically makes to move away from him. Jeno scratches him again before he can, though, and Jaemin hisses, as his hips buck up involuntarily. That causes Jeno to moan and they're both so shocked, that the next second they find themselves on opposites ends of the bed.

"Holy shit," Jeno pants, bewildered.

"Don't do that again next time you want me to stop," Jaemin advises, mortified.

"Yeah," Jeno says. "I got that."

Jaemin doesn't know what the hell he's doing with his life.

*****

"It's literally been like, three minutes already," Mark laughs.

Jeno doesn't let him go.

"You're telling me three minutes is enough after a year?" he grumbles.

"Come on, man, you know I missed you, too," Mark says, patting his back.

Jeno kind of wants to blurt out what happened with Jaemin right on the spot, but Mark just got back, it wouldn't be fair to him.

"By the way, is it really cool for me to stay at Jaemin's place?" Mark asks for the second time since they met by the arrivals gate.

He had asked Jaemin at least four more times before he came.

"I told you it's fine," Jeno sighs, finally letting Mark escape from his embrace. "He'd be here to get you, too, but his mother called and I'm not sure what it's about, but there is some family emergency or something. So, sorry, you have to spend an hour in a shitty car with me."

"Hey, it's cool that you even have a car, right?" Mark tries. "You didn't have one last year."

"There is no aircon," Jeno deadpans.

"Oh," Mark says, but then he shrugs with a grin. "We can open the windows, right?"

Picking Mark up from the airport was supposed to be done in Jaemin's nice car, but Jeno guesses this isn't so bad. They can catch up without Jaemin's presence that is at this moment rather awkward for Jeno. Not that they ended last night on any weird note, because it was as normal as it could have been, considering what they had done. Jeno really wants to tell Mark everything without worrying about his brain to mouth filter, though.

An hour is not enough, Mark has so much to say about Canada, despite texting Jeno updates fairly often, that they're fifteen minutes from Jaemin's apartment, when Mark finally asks, "And what's up with you?"

Jeno didn't even notice they're almost at their destination, too wrapped up in Mark's stories about people, culture, food, school, and his new boyfriend. Jeno knew about Lucas already, but Mark has never before told him any details about their relationship and Jeno is thirsty for other people's drama.

"Right, uh," he says to Mark's question. "I made out with Jaemin."

Mark's head snaps to him so fast, Jeno can hear his neck pop.

"WHAT?!"

"Twice," Jeno adds.

Mark stares at him for the next few, long seconds and then lets out the heaviest sigh Jeno has heard in his life.

"Leave you two for one fucking year," Mark mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose. He looks up to check their surroundings. "Drive to the park."

"What? But we're close to-"

"We obviously can't go to his place now, dumbass!" Mark exclaims. "You didn't tell me anything about this the last time we texted!"

"I'd miss out on this reaction," Jeno tries, but it's too meek to be proper teasing and Mark's raised eyebrow is entirely unimpressed.

So Jeno drives to the park and they walk to the playground. It's lunch time, which means the swings are free of kids and Mark and Jeno claim them right away.

"Tell me everything," Mark says. "And I mean everything. It started with Lee Donghyuck, right?"

Jeno sighs.

"Yeah."

And he tells Mark from the beginning.

After he's done, Mark just sort of looks at him for a long moment.

"Are you out of your fucking mind?" he asks finally. "A deal to do sexu-" he hisses, stops himself and looks around to make sure no kids can hear him. He finishes in a vicious whisper, "A deal to do sexual stuff? With Jaemin? Jen, you had never even kissed anyone before!"

"I know!" Jeno exclaims, then quieter, "I know, okay? But I'd never do anything like this with anyone else I know."

"Then don't! You don't have to sleep with anyone just for the sake of it!" Mark yells in frustration. "This is such a bad idea for so many reasons, oh my god!"

Jeno kicks the dirt under his feet and sways himself on the swing a bit. He feels awful.

"I get it, man," he mutters. "I really do."

"But?" Mark asks, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

Jeno opens his mouth, but shame gets to him before he can say it.

"You don't want to stop, do you!" Mark guesses. "Holy shit, what have I come back to?"

"Sorry," Jeno mumbles.

His feelings are all over the place and now he's even pulling Mark into this mess.

"Look," Mark says, taking a deep breath. Jeno thinks he looks good with black hair. Last year it was blond. "I'm dead tired from my flight, so help me out a little here, yeah? You're telling me you thought you were asexual, might actually be demisexual and you figured that out because of a crush on Lee Donghyuck. And then Jaemin also had a crush on the very same guy, so you two decided to explore your newfound sexualities together, since that guy is taken. You don't know, if you're just curious, or if you actually feel something for Jaemin now, and you have no idea what's his take on this whole thing, because you didn't really talk about it after you almost had sex. Is that more or less it?"

It's right on the spot, but Jeno is too busy with both, sulking and thinking about almost having sex with Jaemin, to properly acknowledge that.

"It was last night," he defends himself weakly.

"Are you trying to tell me you went straight to bed after?" Mark asks. "You think I know you since yesterday? You probably messed around on Jaemin's game console or something."

Jeno sulks harder, because he can't deny it. Mark knows him too well. Knows both of them too well.

"Just one more time," Jeno mumbles. His chest twinges and he's grown to know that feeling too well by now. "I wanna see, if anything changes, if I kiss him again. And then I'll tell him I'm calling it off and we're gonna get back to being best friends and nothing more."

Mark sighs, looks out into the distance, narrowing his eyes in the blinding sun.

"That's all cool, if you think that's gonna be enough for you," he says quietly. "But what about him?"

Jeno doesn't want to think about that. He hopes more than anything that his selfish wants aren't going to get Jaemin hurt.

*

"Ah, man, this is great!" Mark sighs in content, pushing away his empty plate. "I haven't tasted your cooking in a year! Lucas is shit at it. I finally feel like I'm home."

Jeno is pretty sure Jaemin turns to the sink just to hide how touched he feels hearing that. It's pretty endearing. Jeno watches him for a moment and almost forgets about Mark being there. Mark reminds him with a pointed clearing of his throat. Jeno can feel his face get hot immediately, but he glares at Mark, anyway. Mark only shakes his head and leaves him be, but Jeno can feel his judgement for the rest of the night.

The next day, they meet together, all seven of them. For the lack of a better word, Jeno would call what happens between Mark and Donghyuck a standoff.

"So you're the infamous Lee Donghyuck, huh," Mark says, head held high and arms crossed over his chest.

"And you're the perfect boy Mark Lee," Donghyuck purrs, his stance indicating he's ready to jump any second.

Jeno, Renjun and the brats would probably all want to see how this plays out, but Jaemin, for some reason, isn't entertained.

"Can you fucking chill, both of you?" he asks, clucking his tongue. "Good thing we didn't meet at the lake right away, I wouldn't wanna spend the day answering questions about someone getting drowned."

Donghyuck rolls his eyes, but leaves the apartment without a single comment, even when Jaemin passes him one of the portable refrigerators. Renjun follows him, glancing at Mark curiously.

"You're back!" Chenle exclaims, throwing himself at Mark now that the show is over. Mark laughs and catches him easily. "Tell me all about that Chinese boyfriend of yours!"

"Well, actually, he's half Thai," Mark starts and then goes into a funny story Jeno already knows, ruffling Jisung's hair in the meantime and then dragging both of the youngest with him outside the door.

It's unexpectedly weird to be left alone with Jaemin. Jeno shifts slightly to do something about himself and then grabs the other refrigerator.

"Let's go before they trash your car, I saw Jisung snatch the keys," he says.

"Hey, Jen," Jaemin stops him and his voice is odd. When Jeno looks over at him, his face is unreadable, the same business smile he greets strangers with. Jeno hates that smile. "We're cool, right?"

Jeno's heart is pounding suddenly. He doesn't know what his emotions are even doing right now. He wants to let Jaemin pin him to the wall, but he also wants to talk and maybe cuddle.

"Yeah," he smiles, too, and knows Jaemin can tell it's fake as well. "We're totally cool, man. Why?"

"No, it's," Jaemin pauses, messes up his hair, grabs the bag with towels from the floor. "It's nothing," he says finally.

When he passes Jeno on his way to the door, the air smells like sunscreen and regret. Jeno grits his teeth and follows him out.

"I get everything, now that I met him," Mark declares once they're seated in Jaemin's car already.

"Get what?" Chenle asks immediately, but Mark ignores him.

Since he's freshly back, he gets to ride shotgun, and that leaves Jeno squeezed between the two brats in the backseat.

"But still, you two are really dumb," Mark adds.

"I knew it," Jisung mumbles quietly on Jeno's right.

Jeno glances at him warily. Jisung is scarily perceptive, so it's not that much of a surprise that he noticed something. Jeno wonders why Jaemin didn't tell him, since he usually tells Jisung everything. Maybe if it's all so confusing to Jeno, it's the same for Jaemin, too. That's a weird thought, since Jaemin is always so sure about himself, but it's not a normal situation. Even Jaemin can feel thrown off, Jeno knows that for a fact. This would be one of those times it's not that shocking.

"Knew what?" Chenle hisses at Jisung, like Jeno isn't sitting right there between them.

Chenle, in turn, has scarily sensitive hearing. Jeno considers telling Jaemin he wants to go home for today, after all.

Jisung throws Chenle a glance that says _We'll talk about this later_. At least one of them is smart. Jeno isn't above throwing them into the lake from the pier and Jisung realizes that speculating about this particular thing can get them just that.

"Shut up," Jaemin says to all of them, but mostly to Mark.

He seems to be in a bad mood. Jeno wonders why.

Mark does shut up, but only for the ride. Once they're there, he picks up right where he left off with Donghyuck. Donghyuck is happy to indulge him, and it's a pissing contest from there. Renjun seems amused by it, the brats bet on the most ridiculous things concerning the two newly found rivals, Jeno can't be bothered to play a mediator, and Jaemin stops caring once it's clear they're not actually going to hurt each other. All in all, it's a pretty nice day. It feels like they've all been together like this for ages already.

"Man, I wish Lucas was here," Mark says at some point, looking at the clear sky like a maiden in some shitty historical drama.

Jaemin rolls his eyes.

"You saw him just two days ago."

"Yeah, but that was just the two of us," Mark shrugs. "I wish he could come here and meet all of you."

"What, even me?" Donghyuck asks, faking surprise. "I'm flattered you think I'm such good company, Mark!"

Mark glances at him, opens his mouth, and promptly closes it, deciding it's not worth it. They're chilling on the blanket, eating the sandwiches Jaemin made. The sky is a frightening shade of blue. Other people are talking and laughing down the beach, the air is distorted by the awful heat and insects are buzzing around them. A perfect summer day, Jeno thinks.

"For how long are you staying, Mark?" Renjun asks casually.

He's playing with Donghyuck's wet hair spread on the blanket near his ankle.

"Three weeks," Mark says.

"Did you bring us something cool from Canada?" Jisung asks.

"Such materialistic bastards, all of you," Mark clucks his tongue playfully. He adds, "Obviously I did!"

Jeno enjoys being near Mark again after so long. It feels like it's only been a week, since they saw each other last, but Jeno knows that from now on, he's going to start noticing all the small changes that speak of the time they spent apart. He's okay with that.

Jaemin, Renjun and Jisung disappear somewhere together at some point. When they get back, Jaemin seems to feel a bit better. The day out is tiring, but so much fun. Mark and Donghyuck get along perfectly well, despite bickering constantly, and the rest can't say they're surprised. When it starts to get chilly, they pack up and leave, Donghyuck and Renjun first, the rest of them right after. Jaemin drops Chenle off first, then Jisung, and looks at Jeno in a strange way, as they stop in front of his house. It's a way that makes something in Jeno's stomach flutter wildly. There is a second, when he expects something to happen, but then Jaemin turns back towards the front of the car and Jeno blinks, getting out.

"Thanks for the ride," he says with a small, unsure grin.

"Yeah," Jaemin answers.

His voice is hoarse. Mark's gaze is heavy on Jeno's back, as he walks the few steps leading up to the porch.

Just once more, he promises himself.

*

Jeno is bored out of his mind at work, when Jaemin, as usual, comes over to keep him company.

"Where is Mark?" Jeno asks.

It's a fair question. Since Mark came back five days ago, they either do everything together with Jaemin and Jeno, or hang out also with the remaining four.

"He doesn't feel well right now, so I left him home," Jaemin says.

"Is he sick?"

"I don't think so," Jaemin shrugs. "It's a lot hotter here than in Canada, his body can't deal with it, probably. I told him to rest and drink a lot."

Jeno nods, relieved. The last think he'd want is for Mark to get sick, when they only have three weeks together.

"I brought you food," Jaemin says, showing Jeno the plastic container.

"I love you, dude, I haven't had anything except for gum in four hours!" Jeno whines immediately.

Jaemin stills for a second, staring at Jeno with wide eyes.

"What?"

Jaemin shakes himself off.

"Nothing. Hurry up and flip the sign."

Jeno raises an eyebrow at him, suspicious, but doesn't comment. He walks to the door to flip the sign reading "Welcome!" on one side and "Lunch break! Please wait fifteen minutes, we apologize for your inconvenience!" on the other. Jeno thinks his boss could just hire more than one person per shift or make the shifts shorter, but who is he to criticize. No one ever comes to this gas station anyway.

Jaemin places the container on the counter and Jeno opens it eagerly.

"You made me fried rice with egg?!" he exclaims happily. "Dude, you're the best!"

"I know," Jaemin says solemnly. "Praise me more, come on."

Jeno flicks him on one bare, tanned arm. Jaemin only glares at him.

"So that's the thanks I get, huh," he intones dramatically. "I went through all this trouble just for this disrespect?"

Jeno doesn't know why he does what he does next. He already established that his brain doesn't work like it probably should. Jaemin freezes in shock, when Jeno grabs the front of his tee, pulls him closer and plants a soft kiss on his lips.

"That better?" Jeno mumbles, focusing on his food to stop feeling so damn self-conscious.

Jaemin clears his throat and scratches his arm awkwardly.

"I also have cookies in the car," he says. "I'll go get them."

He fumbles with the door a little and Jeno is trying not to grin stupidly by the time Jaemin gets out. His heart is beating so fast for all the stupid reasons.

Jaemin gets back with his ears still flushed, but doesn't say anything about what just happened. Jeno finishes his food and then they share the cookies. A customer shows up with a dog and she's nice enough to let them pet it, so the rest of the evening they talk about animals. By the time they get to Jaemin's place, it's way past eleven. Mark is asleep on the couch. Jaemin covers him with a blanket, smiling a little at the incoherent mumbling the action causes. Jeno's chest twinges again. Jaemin turns off the lights and they tiptoe to Jaemin's bedroom.

"Hey," Jaemin says after they've been lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling for at least ten minutes.

Jeno is tired from work, and Jaemin's dimly lit bedroom is so cozy and familiar, all he does in response is hum a little.

"Can I kiss you?" Jaemin asks quietly.

Jeno snaps to full awareness in a millisecond, his heart snapping with him.

"Yeah," he whispers.

The last time.

Jaemin rolls onto his side and Jeno does the same. They look at each other for a long moment. Jeno doesn't think he wants it to end. He can't tell what Jaemin wants and it scares him.

Jaemin's fingers are warm and delicate on his face, they cause a pleasant shiver to run down his spine. Jaemin's eyes are dark and full. Jeno closes his own, gives himself over to Jaemin's hands and lips. It hurts in the best way, when Jaemin kisses him, Jeno's chest tight with things he can't name.

It's so different than the last time. They don't rush, don't heat up, they let it simmer quietly between them, and Jeno thinks it might actually be worse like this. Like this, it means something.

The night is loud outside the cracked open window, but Jaemin's bedroom is a fluffy blanket, snuggling them in sleepy silence. Jeno could fall asleep like this, with Jaemin's warm lips on his own, with Jaemin's warm body pressed to his. Jaemin doesn't break the kiss like he did those previous times, he lets it gradually weaken until they're barely sharing breath, until, finally, they're no longer in each other's space.

Jaemin gets off the bed, messes up his hair. Jeno watches him, trying to pick at the ache spreading in his gut.

"I'm gonna go get some water," Jaemin says.

His voice sounds strange. Jeno doesn't think he's ever heard it become like this. He only spends another four seconds staring at the door that closed after Jaemin, before he stands up. Jaemin is standing by the sink, hands supported on the edge with a white-knuckled grip. His back is tense. Jeno swallows heavily and walks up behind him, circling his slim waist with his arms. Jaemin tenses up even more, but relaxes slowly, when Jeno doesn't let go.

"I want to stop doing this," Jeno whispers into the back of Jaemin's neck.

Jaemin shivers and sighs heavily.

"I know," he whispers back.

"You do?"

"Yeah," Jaemin huffs, but it's not as amused as he probably wanted it to be. More than anything, it's sad. "I also think we should stop."

"Oh," Jeno says and thinks, _I did it. I got Jaemin hurt_. "M'sorry," he mumbles.

His throat is tight.

"It's not your fault," Jaemin says.

He holds Jeno's arms that are still hugging him firmly. Jeno has never before felt a twinge this strong. 

*****

"So you're just gonna sit here heartbroken for the rest of the summer, huh," Donghyuck says, all condescension and disdain.

Jaemin drags his empty gaze up to Donghyuck's face.

"What? I'm not heartbroken?" he says, but it comes out more like a question and he hates that.

Donghyuck raises his eyebrows until they get lost under his fringe. Then, he turns to Mark and points at Jaemin as if to say _Can you fucking believe this?_

"You're not gonna do anything about it, Mark? Seriously? Aren't they your best friends?"

"Yeah," Mark shrugs. "But I talked to both of them already, there is like, literally nothing else I can do about this. It's their lives."

Donghyuck huffs, exasperated, then decides Mark is useless, apparently, because he turns his attention back on Jaemin. Jaemin admits he might look just a tiny bit miserable, sitting on the floor under his refrigerator and staring blankly at whatever's before him (it's the kitchen table's leg), but he's going to be just fine without Donghyuck's meddling, thanks. He's already almost fine. He hasn't seen Jeno in five days, sixteen hours and - he glances at the kitchen clock - twenty seven minutes. He's starting to get it together, really.

"Listen to me you absolute imbecile," Jaemin puffs up, offended, but Donghyuck only crouches in front of him and grabs his shoulder fiercely. "Why the hell do you think I kissed you?" Mark gasps, like he has any business being scandalized. No, that's not fair, Jaemin backtracks, of course Mark has a business being scandalized after all the drama both Jaemin and Jeno pulled him into. "You think I wanted to do that?" Donghyuck continues and Jaemin scowls at him. "It was to help you realize you don't want me, you moron!"

"I know that," Jaemin mutters reluctantly.

Mark is staring at them with an open mouth. He looks like a monkey.

"But you apparently don't know that I also did it to make you realize you want someone else!" Donghyuck hisses.

Jaemin blinks at him. He must look dumber than Mark now.

"What?"

"It's not a phase, you moron!" Donghyuck cries out. "It's not curiosity! It's desire, you stupid fuck!"

Mark chokes on air a little. Jaemin admits it is strange to hear Donghyuck say 'desire' out loud.

"You see what I'm getting at?" Donghyuck asks, patronizing, like he's been trying to make Jaemin understand that two plus two equals four for at least an hour. "Sure, you crushed on me. Sure, I might have been your gay awakening or whatever. But you don't want me. You want him. You have for a while, maybe even before I came along, and you're only now starting to realize _it's a possibility to have him_! Of course you're fucking heartbroken!"

Jaemin tries to turn that information over in his head until it's absorbable.

"Well," Mark says. "At least it's never boring with you two, I have to admit that."

Donghyuck narrows his eyes at him, as a slow, creepy grin grows on his face.

"Oh Mark, you have no idea how interesting it can be with me added to the mix," he croons.

Jaemin shudders in dread, but he's too stunned to react. Mark sighs.

"I'm just only starting to understand, yeah," he mutters. He looks at Jaemin. "That mean you won't make me drive over alone just to give Jeno his dinner today?"

Each day, Jaemin made food for Jeno to bring him during his shift, and each day, he chickened out right before doing it, getting Mark to do it for him. It's not that Mark minds, because he's here to see both of them, not just hang out with Jaemin alone, but this entire situation must be hard on him, too. It was Jeno and Jaemin's idea to convince him to come and now they're too busy being dramatic to properly hang out with Mark.

"Get out of my kitchen," Jaemin says. "I have to think. Wait for the food in the living room."

"Make enough for all of us," Donghyuck instructs. "I invited Renjun and the brats."

Jaemin doesn't even yell at him for inviting people into his apartment. He's too focused on trying to figure out what's even happening inside him.

"I can't believe you kissed him," Mark says, as they leave.

"You want a kiss, too, Markie?"

"Call me that again and my foot is gonna be kissing your ass."

"Kinky."

"Shut up."

Jaemin stands up and opens the fridge.

*

It's raining, a relief from two weeks spent in heat and humidity. Jaemin doesn't care his t-shirt is going to get soaked, when he leaves the apartment, despite Renjun yelling after him to grab an umbrella.

"Good luck!" Jisung calls right before Jaemin closes the door.

"Just don't fuck at the station, you're gonna-" Chenle throws and Jaemin would open the door right back up, but he doesn't have the strength to deal with Chenle's- well, Chenle's everything right now. 

He barely has enough strength to actually make it to the gas station and not turn around like the biggest coward. He might be the biggest coward anyway. Jeno tried texting him and even calling and Jaemin ignored him each time. It makes him queasy to think about what is going to happen next. He has no plan whatsoever. If he started coming up with some scenarios, he'd never be able to go through with this. He doesn't remember being this nervous ever before.

He did think it through, but just enough to be sure of what he wants. He imagined kissing Jeno again, doing dumb stuff with him, teasing him and embarrassing him on dates, actually going on dates with him. He imagined them cuddling and fighting, and making up. He imagined them being together and his heart nearly gave out because of how fucking amazing that looked in his head. He wants that in reality, there is no doubt about it. He can't believe he's admitting it, but Donghyuck was right. Jaemin doesn't want to experiment. Jaemin wants Jeno.

When he bursts into the store, there are four customers in a line by the counter and Jaemin thinks that's just his luck. He's never seen so many people at once here before. Of course they show up just when he's desperate to talk to Jeno. They all startle at his sudden arrival. Jaemin's t-shirt clings to his torso uncomfortably.

Jeno stares at him in shock and Jaemin holds his gaze, until the closest customer clears their throat to snap Jeno out of it. The rest of them glares at Jaemin for making the wait longer. Jaemin glares right back and strides over to the end of the line.

Jeno deals with the customers as quickly as he can, but it doesn't mean he's eager to talk, once it's Jaemin standing directly in front of him. It's awkward. Jeno reaches for the gum, rings it up and places it on the counter before Jaemin. Jaemin obediently gives him money, then switches the gum with the dinner he brought for Jeno. Jeno looks down at it, as if he expects an alien to pop out.

The rain is heavier now, banging on the windows. The light of glow tubes over their heads is harsh in the unexpected gloom of the day. Jeno still looks good even washed out by it. Jaemin shudders, the air conditioning not helping for the chilly feeling the rain already served him. Jeno glances up and their gazes meet. Jaemin's heart gives a few heavy thumps.

"You brought me dinner," Jeno says, stupidly.

Jaemin knows Jeno doesn't cry, but right now, he looks like he might.

"I make you food every day, though," Jaemin reminds him.

"Yeah, but," Jeno starts and stops.

They both know what he means. His hand stretches, aiming for Jaemin's face or maybe head, and Jaemin gulps, almost sweating from nerves and anticipation, but Jeno withdraws his arm. Jaemin tries to swallow again, this time the disappointment.

Jeno sets his jaw and walks out from behind the counter. He moves to the front door and flips the sign. Jaemin watches him. Everything hurts. Jeno returns, but doesn't separate them with the counter anymore. He stands right in front of Jaemin. Jaemin can feel his warmth from this distance and he wants to be even closer. He shivers again. Jeno huffs and Jaemin doesn't know why.

"You're soaked," Jeno observes.

"You're so perceptive," Jaemin deadpans.

Jeno almost smiles. Jaemin's heart is pounding now. Jeno reaches out again and doesn't stop this time. He grabs the hem of Jaemin's wet t-shirt, glances up at him from under his dark lashes and Jaemin isn't cold anymore.

"Take it off," Jeno murmurs. "I'll give you something dry to wear."

Jaemin nods jerkily, but this is something he wasn't prepared for, and suddenly, stripping in front of Jeno, even if just his upper half, seems like a big deal. He tries to get it together. Jeno has seen him shirtless countless times. The semi-darkness outside and artificial light inside make it seem like they're cut off from the world, though, and Jaemin feels so vulnerable without a reason.

"Nana," Jeno gets even closer. Their noses almost touch. Jaemin's breath hitches and stays locked at Jeno's next words. "I hurt you, didn't I."

Jaemin shakes his head, ducking it to avoid Jeno's dark eyes.

"I did," Jeno says. "You look pissed and sad."

Jaemin guesses he's both of those things, but it's not Jeno's fault.

"I missed you," Jeno whispers and Jaemin thinks he might explode.

"It's been like, four days," he manages with a weak laugh.

"Tell me about it," Jeno sighs wistfully.

Jaemin grins, looking back up at him. Jeno grows serious the more they stare at each other.

"Why did you bring me dinner, Nana?" he asks finally.

Jaemin takes a deep breath, but it escapes before he even opens his mouth. His chest feels so tight.

"Because I avoided you like the biggest douche and now I want to know where we stand," he says.

His voice wavers. He wonders how lame he can get tonight. He wonders, if they're still best friends. Jeno bites down on his lip and Jaemin wants to do that for him.

"I… don't know," Jeno whispers. "It's scary."

Jaemin's heart lurches.

"Why?" he asks urgently. "Tell me why it's scary for you and I'll tell you why it is for me."

"That's unfair, Nana," Jeno whines. His breath is hot on Jaemin's face. Jaemin's eyes slide down to his lips. "You say it first."

It's easier to be looking at Jeno's pink lips than into his deep eyes.

"Fine," he mumbles, distracted. "It's scary, 'cause I wanna-"

Jeno kisses him before he gets to the end of that sentence. Jaemin makes a sound, something tiny and pained and relieved, and clings to Jeno without another thought. It's a simple kiss, soft and short, and Jeno straightens again, but his hands are in Jaemin's hair.

"Please tell me this was what you wanna do, I don't want to get punched," he says, lips curled and eyes curled.

Jaemin falls into him and Jeno accommodates him so easily. They fit together just right.

"Yeah," Jaemin rasps and Jeno shivers under him. "That was it. I wanna do more, though."

Jeno slowly pulls them apart. Jaemin feels agitated again, held at an arm's length like that. Jeno inhales and holds Jaemin's gaze.

"If you wanna get back to experimenting, I can't do that," he says.

Jaemin doesn't understand.

"Then why did you kiss me?"

Jeno grimaces.

"Because I like you, Nana," he says, hushed, embracing himself awkwardly, trying to make himself small. "I don't want to be an experiment."

Jaemin doesn't remember how to fucking breathe.

"You like me," he repeats, in awe.

Jeno shrugs, avoiding him.

"Yeah," he admits quietly. "So, I'm sorry I hurt you before, but I've thought about it and I want more, and it's so scary."

"Me, too," Jaemin whispers, because he doesn't trust his voice. Jeno snaps up his head, eyes wide. "I still want to experiment, but only with you. We're used to being best friends, so it might be weird at first to be more, but I want that."

Jeno smiles and he's more radiant than the awfully bright glow tubes, he's more blinding than the sun that's absent today.

"So," he says, grabbing the hem of Jaemin's t-shirt again. "Boyfriends?"

"Boyfriends," Jaemin confirms.

His throat clicks. His ears feel hot, but Jeno's whole face is red, so he doesn't feel too self-conscious about it. They grin at each other like loons and then Jeno strips him off of the t-shirt slowly, peeling it from his damp skin and replacing it with his warm hands. They kiss again, Jeno pins Jaemin to the counter, hugging him tightly in the process. Jeno's heart is as loud as Jaemin's and it's a comforting thought that it's not just Jaemin who has no idea what he's going. They're both in over their heads. Jaemin doesn't want anything else.

He ends up waiting for Jeno to finish his shift, dressed in Jeno's oversized hoodie. Jeno likes to feel smaller than he is sometimes, not just when he's ashamed. He likes poeple to take care of him. Jaemin remembers the way Jeno melted into him that time in the kitchen, trusting and pliant. Thinking about it makes something hot curl in the pit of Jaemin's stomach.

"Stop staring," Jeno mutters for the second time, focused on some notebooks he has spread under the counter. It's something to do with his job, but Jaemin isn't sure what.

Jaemin smiles to himself. He's so happy. It's a ridiculous feeling.

"You're so cute, though, being all serious and diligent," Jaemin pouts, making his voice sound disgustingly cute. "I can't help but look."

Jeno glances up at him with such repulsion, Jaemin bursts out laughing. Jeno pushes him off the chair he just let him use.

Boyfriends, Jaemin thinks, proceeding to annoy Jeno even more. He likes the sound of that.

*

Jeno makes a confused sound, as Jaemin lets him into the apartment first.

"What?" Jaemin asks.

"You said they're all here," Jeno turns over his shoulder to look at him.

"Yeah," Jaemin nods.

Jeno walks further into the apartment. It's empty. Jaemin sweeps the living room with a suspicious gaze. For all he knows, they could be hiding to jump out on them. He checks behind the couch and pats down the curtains, as Jeno stands there and watches him with amusement, but the room is as empty as it seems. Jaemin peeks into the kitchen, then into his bedroom, then the bathroom.

"Those fuckers really got me to make them food and then got the hell out," he says, puzzled.

"Nana," Jeno says from really close suddenly.

Jaemin can't help the shiver that runs down his spine and whirls around. Jeno steadies him easily, when Jaemin almost falls on his ass from shock at the sudden proximity. 

"I think they actually wanted to be good friends for once," Jeno grins and wiggles his eyebrows, and it looks ridiculous.

Jaemin flushes.

"What if you rejected me, though? It was a possibility."

"You thought it was a possibility. They might be smarter than you," Jeno says.

Jaemin smacks his arm and then pulls him close.

"I wanna kiss you all over," he admits, after Jeno melts into him. "Can I?"

Jeno is the one who flushes now, and Jaemin feels surer about himself. Jeno nods shyly, biting his lip.

"How can you even say something like that out loud?" he asks, but his voice is breathy, and he lets Jaemin pull him to the bedroom.

"You ain't gonna tell me to stop?" Jaemin teases.

He feels high. Jeno nudges him with not enough force. Jaemin pushes him down onto the bed.

"It's actually kinda nice," Jeno admits with an embarrassed laugh. "I'm not really confident in what I'm doing, so it's good to know you are."

Jaemin's brain disappears in a puff of smoke. Jeno makes a surprised sound, when Jaemin kisses him with newfound aggression, but doesn't push him away. Jaemin pulls him up the bed as much as he can without being able to focus on it and hikes up his legs until they circle his waist. Jeno is looking up at him, flushed and dazed. Jaemin leans down to attack his neck, to suck dark marks into the skin, and Jeno whimpers, fingers finding their way into Jaemin's hair and tugging. Jaemin wants him naked. He wants him panting and whining in pleasure. He wants-

"Nana! Hey, _ah_ , Jaemin!" Jeno gasps and Jaemin snaps out of it, sitting up immediately. "Too fast," Jeno rasps, his cheeks splotchy red. 

Jaemin nods, presses his sorry into the hollow of Jeno's throat.

"It still works like before," he mumbles. "If you don't want me to do something, push me away."

"Yeah," Jeno agrees and his hands sneak underneath Jaemin's hoodie to scratch up his back without any warning.

Jaemin's breath hitches and he arches his back with a deep moan.

"God, wanted to do that for so long," Jeno says, in awe.

Jaemin can't believe this is happening.

"Jen," he breathes, looking down at him, mind hazy. "Take this thing off of me."

Jeno is happy to oblige, throwing the hoodie to the floor somewhere and getting his hands back on Jaemin immediately after. His fingers are so long and smooth, and Jaemin wants them in him, but shoos away the thought for another time. They're both going on intuition here, Jaemin has to more research before they do some other stuff than dick touching.

"Now take this off of yourself," Jaemin huffs, tugging at Jeno's shirt.

Jeno pauses for half a second, then scratches over Jaemin's stomach and lets out a quiet _damn_ at the way Jaemin tenses and quivers under the touch. Jaemin is actually losing his mind here. Jeno grins and manages to get rid of his shirt, and then Jaemin can play with his nipples, which is great. It's different than with a girl, but not in a bad way at all. Jeno is almost as sensitive, he makes these tiny little noises every time Jaemin's teeth catch on his skin in the right way. Experimentally, Jaemin bites down harder and sucks the sting away right after, and Jeno whines so loudly, Jaemin is starting to worry about his neighbors interrupting them to complain.

"Shit," Jaemin chokes out, glancing up at Jeno's very red face, as Jeno stares at him with wide eyes. "I never woulda thought you like it rough."

"Oh my god," Jeno whispers, covering his face with his hand. "I changed my mind, don't say those things out loud."

"And you also like being embarrassed," Jaemin teases. Jeno swipes at him blindly and Jaemin dodges with a laugh. "Hey, Jen," he calls, and Jeno looks at him again. "I'm gonna touch your cock, okay?"

Jeno lets out a strangled sound and hides again. Jaemin smirks and pops the button of Jeno's denim shorts open. Jeno doesn't make it easier in the slightest, but Jaemin finally gets rid of the clothing. Jeno's hard, and his briefs hide nothing, and Jaemin remembers no one has ever touched Jeno like he is about to. That makes him lose himself a little again, so he shakes his head to get a grip.

"Stop. Staring," Jeno grits through his teeth, trying to close his legs.

Jaemin holds them open and doesn't really care about leaving finger shaped bruises on the pale skin. Jeno apparently doesn't mind a bruise or two, and Jaemin would gladly make him red and purple all over. Jeno makes another sound, so Jaemin smooths a hand up his stomach, shushing him gently, and Jeno actually relaxes into it, letting his legs fall open easily now. It makes Jaemin's mouth water. He wrestles Jeno free of the underwear, too. Jeno's cock is, for the lack of a better word, pretty. Jaemin is a little envious. It's pink and long, and Jaemin wants to know what it tastes like.

Jeno whines in protest again.

"Fine, fine, Jesus, I'm touching you now," Jaemin mumbles and wraps a hand around him. Jeno's whole body shudders and he gasps. "Don't be shy, Jen, tell me how you like to be touched. You do it to yourself, don't you. Spill it."

"Shut up, I don't know," Jeno breathes.

Jaemin gives a tug. Jeno tenses up. Jaemin decides it can't feel too good with such dry skin. He reaches over to his nightstand for the lube and pours some on his hand, before touching Jeno again. Jeno whimpers and his hips buck up, and Jaemin is so turned on. He sets a slow rhythm, his grip delicate. Jeno thrashes on the bed in frustration.

"Nana," he whines, grabbing Jaemin's forearm and putting the other hand on Jaemin's bent knee.

"Harder?" Jaemin asks. He's having so much fun, teasing Jeno like this. Jeno nods urgently. "Come on, kitten, use your words."

They both still. Jeno's eyes are wide again. Jaemin thinks, shit, damn habit. He's never called any of his partners 'kitten' before, but he always uses some sort of endearment during sex. He wouldn't say a word, if Jeno pushed him off the bed now.

Jeno's eyelids slowly fall, until his gaze is heavy and dark.

"Do it harder, please," he whispers.

Jaemin chokes on his spit. He doesn't care anymore, he decides, moving down the bed and leaning down to lick up the length of Jeno's cock and take it into his mouth right after.

"Holy fuck, Nana!" Jeno cries out, his voice going high.

Jaemin likes it when Jeno calls him Nana, but he didn't think he could like it this much. Jeno's fingers are back in his hair, pulling, and Jaemin lets them. He doesn't really know what he's doing, but it has been done to him, so it can't be that difficult. He minds his teeth and hollows his cheeks, bobbing his head a little. Jeno isn't shy anymore, not about expressing his pleasure, at least, and Jaemin gets the hang of it rather quickly.

"Nana, gonna- cum-" Jeno chokes out too soon.

Jaemin is kind of disappointed. He wanted to learn more of Jeno's reactions. He sits up and wraps a hand around Jeno again, jerking him off with hard and fast movements. Jeno's grip on his arm when he cums has so much force, it leaves little half-moons from Jeno's nails on his skin. Jaemin doesn't stop touching him, until Jeno grabs his wrist, panting harshly.

"I didn't really know," he says after a moment. Jaemin hums questioningly, reaching for the tissues. "I didn't know how I like it," Jeno clarifies. "I don't like getting myself off."

Jaemin looks at him thoughtfully.

"How was this, then?" he asks, cautious.

Jeno laughs breathily, rolling to the side and to his back again.

"Dude," he says, eyes sparkling. "Awesome."

Jaemin grins and gives him a few kisses, gentle, chaste ones. Jeno smiles against his lips and circles his arms around Jaemin's neck, pulling him close. After a while of indulging in simple affection like that, Jaemin straightens, despite Jeno's complaints.

"I have to clean you up," Jaemin tells him and Jeno flushes again, but lets Jaemin do whatever he wants.

Jaemin can't believe some people don't know the benefits of baby wipes in comparison to regular tissues. He also can't believe he just had Jeno's cock in his mouth.

Jeno pulls him right back in after Jaemin throws the tissues in the general direction of the trashcan.

"Wanna touch you, too," Jeno mumbles into his mouth and reaches down to cup Jaemin through his basketball shorts.

Jaemin thought he was fine, but feeling Jeno's long, slender fingers on his dick, even through two layers of clothing, makes his brain melt again. He has to muster all restraint he has to grab Jeno's arm and pause him.

"Are you sure," he asks seriously, staring into Jeno's big, dark eyes.

Jeno frowns slightly and then rolls them over without any effort at all. Jaemin blinks up at him in shock. He admits that although he loves being in charge and having Jeno pliant and shy under him turns him on like nothing else, this is interesting, too. Jeno straddles his thighs, a comfortable weight, and Jaemin doesn't think he's ever been the one with his back touching the mattress, unless someone was riding him. This is different, though. Jeno isn't stronger than him maybe, but he isn't weaker, either. This is all a matter of choice. They couldn't overpower one another, if they wanted, this is about giving up control. Right now, Jaemin lies back and lets Jeno explore.

Jeno seems focused, as he rubs Jaemin's cock with the heel of his palm, and even that feels good. Then, Jeno gets bolder and tugs on Jaemin's shorts and boxer briefs at once, pulling them down enough to have a full view of Jaemin's already leaking dick.

"Huh," Jeno says and circles his fantastic fingers around it, giving a few slow pulls.

Jaemin hisses a little at the dryness and Jeno catches on, rubs his thumb over the slit to spread precum over the whole length. Jaemin wonders, if Jeno really never did this before. Jeno doesn't try to touch him the same way Jaemin touched him. He's careful and methodical, and figures out all of Jaemin's weak spots in no more than a few minutes.

Jaemin's fisting the covers around him, trying to hold on for dear life, because Jeno's fingers are not only incredibly aesthetic, they're also skillful as fuck. A huge portion of Jaemin's mind is screaming YOU'RE GONNA CUM FASTER THAN A VIRGIN, HOLY SHIT IT FEELS SO GOOD, but there is also another portion that's all about _god, he would've been wasted as an asexual_. It might not be the most respectful, but Jaemin knows that in reality, he'd love Jeno regardless of his sexuality. Also, he can barely think right now, so it's not really his fault. Jeno jerks him off slowly, twisting his wrist in just the right way, his grip not too hard, but not too soft, either. Then, his other hand moves down to Jaemin's balls, and Jaemin cums without a warning. Jeno twitches, surprised, but works him through it diligently and then they're sitting there in a weird silence, Jaemin recovering from this huge embarrassment, Jeno staring down at his jizz covered hand.

"Oh my," Jaemin huffs, "fucking God. Are you even real?"

Jeno grins, wipes off his hand, Jaemin's stomach, Jaemin's dick, and falls down on top of him.

"You didn't kiss me all over," he points out.

Jaemin hugs him tightly. His chest swells with happiness.

"I didn't know you like it hard, when I said that," he says. "Want me to do it anyway?"

"Tomorrow," Jeno mumbles into his neck.

He latches onto a patch of skin and sucks until Jaemin knows there is going to be a mark.

"How did you know how to do that?" 

Jeno shrugs.

"Just wanted to try."

Jeno is such a fast learner, Jaemin is almost scared for his life.

"You know," Jeno says quietly. "You told me to push you away, if it feels gross, right? At the beginning."

"Right," Jaemin confirms.

"It's not gross," Jeno says. "I mean, not just with you. In general, touching was never gross for me. It was just wrong in a way. Like, I felt like I should be feeling different than I was during it, but I couldn't, no matter how hard I tried. I just wasn't into it. When people wanted to kiss me and stuff. Even holding hands with someone I just met was weird. Not gross, but weird."

"Okay," Jaemin accepts. "Why are you telling me this now?" 

"Just wanted you to know that's how it is, I guess," Jeno whispers. "And that it's not weird with you, even if maybe it should."

Jaemin holds him tighter, kisses the top of his head.

"I'm so happy," he mumbles in disbelief. "Lee Jeno likes me."

Jeno nips on his collarbone with his teeth. He looks up and his eyes are so full of everything Jaemin wants.

"I want a shower," Jeno says.

His whole face is smiling. Jaemin nods. They shower and spend the next three hours playing Pokémon on Jaemin's console. Around two, Jaemin gets a text from Donghyuck.

**Mark's sad that you forgot about him in ur sex frenzy**

Jaemin swears under his breath, but before he can start feeling guilty and shameful for good, another text comes.

**dont worry Renjun and i will comfort him properly tonight >:)**

Jeno cheers loudly, when he wins a battle. Relieved, Jaemin grabs him to cover his face in obnoxious kisses and Jeno's protests gradually weaken until they turn into quiet, pleased hums.

*****

"So," Donghyuck drawls and Jeno's skin crawls from the tone of his voice. Donghyuck smiles slowly and Jeno moves away from him. "I expect something in return for being the direct cause of you getting together."

Jaemin rolls his eyes.

"You were not a direct cause," he says.

Donghyuck narrows his eyes, but can't do anything more, since Renjun is lying in his lap.

"Fine," Jaemin sighs. "You can send me links to the things you want. Nothing too expensive, though."

Donghyuck grins. Renjun raises his hand and Donghyuck grands him a high five with a flourish. Jeno doesn't want to know what kind of things would get them to high five.

They're sitting in the park, the four of them. Mark, Chenle and Jisung are on a food run. Jeno hopes they get some good pizza.

It was a weird feeling to wake up in Jaemin's bed at almost noon, with Jaemin's arms wrapped around him securely and his breathing calm and steady in Jeno's ear. Not that Jeno never woke up next to Jaemin before, but it felt different this time. It felt peaceful, without any inappropriate thoughts or feelings, because now they're all appropriate. Jeno could lean in to leave a kiss on Jaemin's forehead without it being out of place, because they're together now and he's allowed to kiss and cuddle Jaemin whenever he wants.

It was even weirder, when Mark came back to Jaemin's place. Jeno had just managed to freak out over the bruises on his neck that looked like he was chewed out and spit back up, when the front door opened and closed. Jeno wanted to cover his neck with something, but that would look stupid, so he went out of the bathroom to greet Mark in resignation.

Mark stared at him for a moment with ridiculously round eyes, grinned, and poked Jeno's neck.

"It all worked out, huh. I'm glad," he said, too softly, and Jeno was hugging him the next second, despite neither of them being big on hugging at all.

And then they met with Donghyuck and Renjun, who didn't hold themselves back on teasing and harassing, and with Jisung and Chenle. All Jisung did was wrinkle his nose in distaste upon seeing Jeno's mauled neck and clap Jaemin's shoulder heavily. Chenle nearly rendered them all deaf via squealing and hugged the shit out of Jeno before asking, "So who's sticking it in who?"

Jeno was mortified enough with only that, but Renjun apparently figured he can't leave it like that, because he corrected, "Who's sticking it in whom, dumbass."

Jeno guesses they're supportive in their own, horrible way.

Jaemin laughs at something Renjun says, absolutely radiant under the scarily blue sky, and Jeno's chest twinges like usual, just in a much sweeter way, like a strawberry smoothie dripping down his lungs.

It might have started with the great storm that is Lee Donghyuck, but it will end with so much more. As if he can read Jeno's thoughts, Donghyuck winks at him secretly. Jeno grins. Jaemin's fingers curl around his on the blanket and the summer is full of glitter bursting in Jeno's soul.

**Author's Note:**

> come scream with me about hyuck's beautiful skin, folks


End file.
